These are pieces I am thinking about bringing to writing class.  We were supposed to write a dialogue. Problem is I wrote two pieces and I want to workshop the weaker of the two- although I have to say as a beginner, I'm sure both are pretty weak. Any suggestions welcome. 

#1 Going In For The Gentle Landing

            Ted sat with Angela in his car in front of her apartment building. The rain pelted down on the tiny sedan, which idled on the street, double-parked.

            Angela leaned over. “Thanks for dinner and the ride home.”

            Ted shrugged. “What was I going to do? Pay for your dinner and leave you at the restaurant?”

            “Ha ha. I was just thanking you.”

            “You’re welcome. Have a good night, Angie.”

            Angela stared at Ted. “Aren’t you gonna to walk me to the door?”

            “It’s raining.”

            “And I don’t have an umbrella.” Angela adjusted her dress. “I’m just glad it didn’t rain before we got to Benihana’s.”

            “Well, at least you can take a shower when you get in the door.”

            “Wait. I’m sorry. So you’re not walking me to my door?”
            “Well, if I walk you to the door, then I’m going to get wet getting back into my car and then I’ll have to sit in my wet clothes for my 20 minute drive home.”

            “You could always stay here.”

            “I really need to go home.”

            “Why don’t you come in and wait for the rain to stop?”
            “Um, it’s late.” Ted looked at his right wrist. He wasn’t wearing a watch. “And I have to go to work tomorrow.”

            “So do I.” Angela leaned over further. “We can drive there together.”

            “I have an early meeting.”
            “I don’t mind getting to work a little early.”
            “What I mean is- I really have to get there early.”

            “So you don’t want to come in?” Angela leaned away from Ted.
            “No. I mean, yes. I have to go home.”

            “But I just wanted you to walk me to my door.”

            “It’s just rain. It’s not a big deal to get a little bit wet.”

            “It’s a big enough deal that you won’t walk me to the door with-” Angela’s eyes widened “-your umbrella.”

            “Look, I don’t think it’s fair that you get to walk in, take a shower and I have to sit here in wet pants while I drive on the highway.” Ted waved his hand in front of him as if to indicate an arduous journey. “Do you have any idea how uncomfortable it is for a guy to drive in wet pants?”

            “No,” Angela folded her arms across her chest. “I had no idea wet pants were such a big deal.”

            “Yeah, well. It is.” Ted adjusted his seatbelt. “See you tomorrow, OK?”

            “Whatever.” Angela stepped out into the torrential downpour and ran across the sidewalk into the apartment building.

            Ted gripped the steering wheel a little tighter, watched her enter the elevator and exhaled.

And here is the other dialogue I wrote. It's not entirely autobiographical, but I'll tell ya, I did once have to get a backup dress for a dance because the one I wanted to wear was a LEEETLE bit tight. Just a smidge. The pictures came out beautifully anyway. 

#2 The Backup Dress

            Mary and her mother trudged into the last empty stall of the prom-crazed dressing room at Lohman’s. Amid the excited humming of her peers, Mary held a few undergarments meant to smooth out the curves of women twice her age. Her mother glided in behind her with her arms full of puffy dresses.

            “Mei mei, you try pink one first. Full skirt good for hiding thighs.”

            “Mom, why can’t I just wear my old blue dress? It doesn’t look that bad.”

“The blue dress look too tight. If you lose weight, you wear the blue dress.”

“It’s supposed to be a little tight. You should see what Ellen’s wearing.”

“Oh, I remember! Agnes fit into her wedding chi-pao, just eating three hard-boiled egg a day for two week. She lose lots of weight.”

            “Mom, I probably couldn’t remember MY NAME on three eggs a day.” Mary folded her arms. “I have a calculus test next week. Are you crazy?”

            “Mei mei, I only help you.” The mother sifted through the dresses. “The blue dress look tight and then you have to take prom picture. You look back when you 40 and you know Mommy was right.”

            “So what if the blue one is a little tight?”

            “You try. Don’t slouch.”

            “I hate this pink one. I look like a bottle of Pepto Bismol.”

            “Take the dress off then. We try another one.”

            “This makes me look like a shamrock. Could it BE more green?”

            The mother made a face. “We try purple one.”

Mary rolled her eyes. “Maybe I should take some barfing tips from Auntie Isobel.”

            “Eh! Auntie Isobel only throwing up when she eat too much at fancy buffet.”

            “So starving yourself is better?”
            “Agnes look so good in her wedding picture! Everybody say!”

            “Look, I’m only going to try on one more dress.” Mary snatched a black lace dress off the hook. “Well, I can wear this dress to funerals too, so we’ll get our money’s worth.”

            “Just try eating one meal? The rest of the day, eat two egg with some salt.”

            “Mom!” Mary turned to her mother. “You try solving quadratic equations on two fucking eggs!”

            “Eh!” The mother frowned. “Only cheap girl use that word. Not ladylike.”

“Well,” Mary threw up her hands. “I guess I’m cheap and not ladylike.”

            The mother sighed. “The black dress look nice.”

            She patted Mary’s stomach.

            “Mom!” Mary stomped her foot. “Stop!”

            “Just try. You look so much better in prom picture.”

            “Mom,” Mary said quietly. “Let’s just go home.”

            She gathered up the undergarments, the black lace dress and walked with her mother out of the dressing room.